When a Life Transition Enters the Relationship

Couples often come to therapy because something feels off. Communication feels harder, conflict escalates more quickly, or intimacy feels strained. One or both partners may feel disconnected or misunderstood, and neither is quite sure why. What many couples do not realize is that sometimes the relationship is reacting to a larger system shift, not a relational failure.

As a couples therapist in Frisco and Plano, I work from a systemic perspective. That means I pay attention to how stress, health, life transitions, and nervous system load shape the way partners show up with each other. Perimenopause and menopause are part of that picture more often than couples expect.

When one partner is not sleeping well, is experiencing chronic pain or inflammation, feels mentally overwhelmed, or has a reduced stress threshold, the relationship feels it. Not because anyone is doing something wrong, but because the system itself is under strain. Without context, these changes are often interpreted personally. Partners assume loss of interest, lack of effort, or emotional withdrawal, when in reality the body is working much harder just to stay regulated.

A core part of my work is helping couples slow down and understand what is actually happening beneath the surface. That may include exploring how hormonal changes are affecting energy, mood, intimacy, or patience. It may also include helping couples have more grounded conversations about medical care, boundaries, and realistic expectations during a demanding season of life.

This is not about excusing hurtful behavior or removing accountability. It is about understanding the forces acting on the relationship so that responsibility and compassion can coexist. When couples stop fighting the wrong problem, the work becomes more productive and far less painful.

Healthy relationships are not built on communication skills alone. They are built on understanding each other as whole people living in real bodies, navigating real transitions. That is the lens I bring to couples therapy.